Convicted felon fixed you an apple fritter??? What was he, a former client. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Well, hang on to your seatbelts kiddies:

1. Had sex with a girl on top of her father's grave

2. Had sex with a girl around 3 PM then went out with her sister that night. [img]wink.gif[/img]

3. Told Joe Morgan that sucked after he refused an autograph request.

4. Flew a Cessna 172 over Johnny Bench's home and performed a power on stall then a hammerhead.

5. Had Norman Schwartzkopf chew me a new asshole because I had division color guard duty and a button on one of my pockets was undone.

6. I've touched the Tomb of the Unknown Soldier

7. While living in Germany, I used a geiger counter to detect the radiation cloud from Chernobyl.

8.